Bravery?

I finally learned what not to say to my patient who is battling a chronic illness whether it be cancer, recurrent strokes, kidney failure on dialysis, diabetes with endless complications or anything remotely similar.

Never (ever) say: "You're so brave." in response to their hardships, struggles, and the seeming courage they show making it through each day.

Guilty of this faux pas on an embarrassingly frequent number of occasions, a light bulb finally went off in my head. Uniformly I've received the same response from my patients to my perceived encouraging and complimentary statement. I've been told nicely by some and with exasperation by others something on the order of "Brave? I had no choice in the matter." In other words, trying to pin the word brave on someone fighting for their life is likely neither reassuring nor endearing. In fact, many who've heard these words come out of my mouth probably say to themselves, "Doc just doesn't get it.".

I suppose I'll never really know how annoying my comment, however innocent, feels since I don't walk in their shoes. What I learned was to hold back on this reflexive comment and instead, listen more deeply, respond with the squeeze of my hand on theirs and say less. For this, I'm grateful.

Typing Skills

My Dad was ahead of his day. As school superintendent of the Lago School in Aruba, he insisted that every student learn to type. Mind you, this was back in the day when typewriters looked sort of like the one below. This was also the time when young men launched into careers that had little to do with typing skills whereas women, be the teachers, clerical staff, or housewives benefited from knowing how to type without looking at the keys.

My brother learned to type in high school in Aruba and when he went away to college he was a hot ticket amongst his peers who asked him to type up their papers and reports for class. He earned money by the page. He's still a pretty good typist, probably far better than other men his age.

Hands down, typing was the best skill I mastered in school from the perspective of continuous utilization.  Knowing how to type fast and with accuracy paid off. Countless hours saved. Time is money. More time makes way for more rest.

These days we think nothing of younger folks pecking away at their computer keyboards. I'm not sure how people learn to type these days; probably either  entirely self taught or with a typing tutor on line. The learning starts earlier and earlier; I'd predict many begin as grade school students if not before. In Aruba, back in the late 1960's we learned the 'old school' way where the keys were covered over with heavy duty tape.  We learned to touch type as opposed to the "search and peck" style I see some contemporaries of mine utilize.

Although typing wasn't a necessary skill in Medicine until the early 1990's when email hit the scene, everyone in the field depends on the skill nowadays. The electronic medical record, a prime example of how medical documentation changed in the past ten years makes my point. We type constantly; clinic notes, communications, emails, and other updates fill the gaps between seeing patients. Many of us bring work home in the evening; although this may involve dictation, typing is more common.

Typewriters are a thing of the past except in the lives of  'eccentrics' or the technically challenged. Who among us is not a slave to the keyboard?

I'm grateful that my Dad, who at one time practiced his skills at the typewriter, encouraged all of his students to get into that typing class. Now.